I don’t think anyone reading this blog is surprised when I say I have a low self-esteem. I try to be open about this so that people at least know why I sometimes have a hard time with seemingly simple things. It’s also because, at one point in life, I got tired of pretending I didn’t have a low-self esteem.
The problem now still is, how to get rid of it? This self-esteem issue, combined with a looming case of anxiety (hello, I’m 29 and I hate driving a car because it still scares the shit out of me) do sometimes stop me from Doing Things. I miss the days when I was more devil-may-care. I also feel like because I acknowledge my self-esteem issues I also keep them alive. I’ve defined myself as someone with this problem, thus I have it.
If men define situations as real, they are real in their consequences.
The question is, how do I go from here? To be honest, I have no idea. I’ve already talked about doing Radical Self Love, but I never really started on it. And then, I got a pair of shoes in the mail. I spend ages shifting through the pages of the Sasha site, wondering whether I should get more feminine Chelsea boots (and jump the fashion train) or get the semi-combat boots which reminded me of my punk/goth period in high school.
Maybe it’s a bit embarrassing to say, but I absolutely love these shoes. They’re not that pretty to look at, but they feel 100% completely me. They even make me feel more me. And thus, a seemingly insignificant choice on a shoe-store website, made me feel a bit different.
And maybe it’s the shoes or just realising that picking out things that feel more me actually make me feel happier. Since then I started wearing more clothes in ways that feel more me and done a couple of things that are definitely not what my angsty low-self esteem me would do in a jiffy (cutting my hair short, signing up for events, reaching out to people). And I think I still have more up my sleeve.
So here’s to picking me. Cheers. 🙂
Big thanks to Sasha Shoes for the awesome pair of boots they send me and for their endless patience in waiting for me to write this post.
Can’t spot something unpretty about your shoes. MOst important is that they fit you and that you can walk with them 🙂
The last couple of months I’m mostly living in comfy pants and rainboots- as normal shoes are just a big no no with snow or slush. I don’t care and just enjoy dressing up a little when I go to the city. (even if this dressing up is with old man’s pants that I got for 2,50 euros in a second hand shop- that’s just me)
I Think it’s great to go for the things (clothes or whatever) that feel like you. With fashion, trends, group pressure,… people forget who they are and the road back is more difficult that just being who you are. — just my idea.
Well, I definitely like them and I love how they look, but in the picture, they’re not like “wow stunning”. But still, it doesn’t matter and it’s true. If you like it, you should wear it, especially if it makes you happy. 🙂
And I used to love fashion, the haute couture things etc, I loved reading about it, but at some point the ever changing got dull, especially when you see everyone wears the same uniform on the street. It’s coming back to me, that love for well designed, pretty clothing, but in a more modest and ecological way. I want to collect pieces that will last longer, so I don’t have to figure out every season whether the new style is “me” or not.
Misschien moet je proberen minder te denken wat je zou moeten en meer denken aan wat je wilt. Moet je graag met de auto rijden? Is dat belangrijk voor jou? Ik merk wel dat ik me soms ook eerst enorm druk heb gemaakt over iets… zoals in mijn eentje de verpakkingsvrije winkel binnenwandelen als complete leek op dat vlak. Na maanden twijfelen, heb ik t gewoon eens gedaan. Nu ga ik iedere week en sla ik zelf een praatje met de eigenaars. Ik ben er gelukkiger van geworden. Als je het echt wilt, dan zal je de stap ooit wel eens zetten 😉 en anders was t zo belangrijk niet.
Ik vind zo een schoenen trouwens top. Ga je echt dragen tot ze uit elkaar vallen (in plaats van tot de volgende trend…)
Jup, dat denk ik ook. 😀
En idd, je moet gewoon gaan voor de dingen die je graag wilt, zeker als je er gelukkiger van wordt. Of dat nu verpakkingsvrij shoppen is of schoenen kopen die een trip down memory lane zijn. 😀